For the past days I avoided him like the plague. I valued my sanity. I guarded my heart. I know he noticed – how from being closed friends I suddenly turned cold. But I cannot help it. I do not want gossip. I do not want people to murmur.
And yet I pined away for the friendship lost. A good friend in the making seemingly down the drain. I was sad things are over.
Yet I was reminded of the past. Faithful blog posts showed me how capable I am of handling emotions and how my mind can ultimately win over my heart. I’ve been reminded of the instances wherein feelings would develop for friends but for friendship’s sake I have learned – we both have learned – to let go and fight for the friendship. And both parties survived with no casualties.
Talking with another friend, admitting my weaknesses, has shed light that avoidance is not the solution. Friendships are too valuable to be sacrificed in the name of the often deceptive “love”.
And so, I resolve, to give this friendship a shot. And if it comes down to an honest admission – well – what have I got to be afraid of. I’ve been through much worse and survived.