People write letters. Then they write open letters.
Wrote a really long letter today. Felt very articulate I must say. Felt very introspective too. It’s not everyday you get to analyze why someone behaved the way they did because of how I myself behaved.
So here’s a portion – admittedly edited for public view – just because I like writing (and sharing) so much.
You challenge, frustrate and inspire me at the same time.
Before you came I had no one at par with my skills. I was, unconsciously, the star. But you came – smart, well-versed, experienced, skilled – and suddenly I was no longer the star. You knew what I knew. You’ve experienced what I’ve experienced. Every discovery I make, you knew beforehand.
You were even better than me. And I felt challenged. Finally, a stimulant.
But you have the irritating manner within you where you have to pop my bubble with every exciting discovery I make just because you knew it already. I proclaim my discovery only to be met with dissent because you knew it long before I did and apparently it ain’t as great as I thought it is.
Hence my aggression which I knew aggravated you.
I concede. You are smart. You are well-travelled. More experienced than me. Knows more than me. You’ve touched more lives than I did.
And that is how you inspire me. For despite the irritating and frustrating challenges I find it inspiring that someone my age could have achieved as much. Have been to places I want to go. Have experienced things I want to experience. Have touched people’s lives the same way I want to touch other’s lives.
So I look forward to learning more from you. For yes, you are a worthy adversary but more than that you are a great source of learning.
Just one favor. Don’t pop my bubble too often.
Well it really ain’t freaky as the word freaky means. I just thought I’d call it that. You see I am a writer. I’ve always known that. I love to express my thoughts and emotions into writing. Words are my paint and blank papers are my canvas where I construct my next masterpiece.
And so it was with great joy that I welcomed an existence of almost 24/7 Internet connectivity. Think of all the blog posts I can make everytime inspiration strikes. I will be in writing heaven.
But lo and behold the thing called social media is proving to be my demise. I long to disconnect. Disengage. Deactivate. Yet sadly I can’t. My profession won’t allow me. And so I remain hooked.
I become trapped to the mindless scroll downs I vow not to be enslaved to. It becomes a struggle to catch my drifting mind that’s unawares what’s happening. I loathe what I cannot end.
Thankfully there is still redemption yet left for me. Discipline. The discipline to shut down. To go to the next. To move forward. Realizing life has more to offer.
And so I left. For now. And after chronicling these thoughts through random words penned from a rambling mind, I shall go forth and experience life.
Recently I find myself enjoying the company of a really clever and witty psychology major. I never knew smart and psychology made a good combination. It makes me wonder if I want one for a life partner. We will probably perpetually discuss how the mind works.
Or maybe it’s just because he’s smart. A smart engineer would have us discussing how buildings are built. A smart doctor would have us discussing how the body works. A smart lawyer would have us discussing the intricacies of law. A smart accountant would have us discussing how money works.
I guess it’s a choice of what kind of smart guy I want. Perhaps.
Well, in any case, one thing is for sure. He will be in love with Jesus the same way as I am passionate for Him now.